Sexting: The Rules

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Sexting: The Rules

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Jen Kirsch

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April 23, 2014

If you’re in a relationship or have met a new man, chances are you are one of many who partakes in sexting. Sexting is fun, playful and a great way to rev your partners engine, so to say. It’s flirtatious, fun and a good lead to getting your wants taken care of next time you cross each others paths. 

But with the good comes the bad. I’m not one for rules, but it’s always good to note things to be aware of when it comes to dating trends, such as sexting. Now pull up a chair and get ready to get educated: Sexting 101 is about to go down, below.

1. Be natural

Not so sure you have a way with those kinds of words? Don’t ask a friend to do your dirty work and create a script for you, as it will come off as unnatural (especially if you guys make it to the bedroom later).

Compose sentences that seem similar to those you’d say behind closed doors. To come up with some ideas on what to say, think about certain things you like when intimate with another, and share those thoughts – as explicitly as you’re comfortable with – with the person at the other end of the phone.

2. Know that it can be shared

As fun, playful and egotistically stimulating it is to be a part of a sexting convo, it’s important to be aware that whatever you share can be shared with others.

As trusting as one might seem, know that these days not only can people screen grab your text (ok, sext) history, and easily forward it to others, but we are people who are trained to get public approval, so many of us tend to show them those next to us when we receive them, in a way to show how attractive we are to another. Don’t send anything that you wouldn’t be comfortable with anyone else seeing.

Before you text, ask yourself what your intentions are to text. If they aren’t pure, don’t act.

3. Read the situation

Are you wanting to send a sext solely because you’re under the influence? Are you sexting because you think the fella of your fancy is out with another girl and you want to get his attention? Before you text, ask yourself what your intentions are to text. If they aren’t pure, don’t act.

4. The quicker, the better

The longer you take to reply, the higher the chance the person on the receiving end will get distracted and lose interest, which is total buzz kill (especially after you spent the past hour trying to compose the “perfect,” “sexy,” sext).

Instead of taking time to compose ‘the perfect message,’ be more concerned about your response time. 

5. Be mindful of auto-correct

Nothing ruins a steamy, seductive text like auto-correct. You’ve likely seen many an embarrassing auto-correct texts gone wrong, and trust me, you don’t want to be a culprit.

Even though your mind is obviously elsewhere when sending a sext, be sure to re-read said sext before pressing the send button. 


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