The 5 Predictors of a Strong Relationship | W Network

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The 5 Predictors of a Strong Relationship

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Jen Kirsch

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October 14, 2014


Whether you’re starting something new with a certain someone, or you’re in a long-term relationship or marriage, there are key predictors of what indicates the strongest of relationships. Sure there are things that will make the relationship better, or more enjoyable if you will (money, free time, etc.), but what it comes down to are these five things.

1. Balance of power
It should comes as no surprise that the balance of power in a healthy relationship should be equal. When one partner is calling the shots, and has more control over the other, there will no doubt be a power struggle in the relationship. We teach people how to treat us by what we’re willing to put up with, so early on in the relationship, be sure to stand up for yourself and speak up when your partner is trying to gain control in unhealthy ways. Put downs, condescending comments, possessiveness and abuse of any kind have no place in a healthy, adult relationship. Both of you should have clear boundaries, and be respectful of them. 

2. Communication
Do you catch yourself constantly walking on eggshells afraid to rock the boat? Or are you able to share with the inner-workings of your wondrous mind with your partner? How well you communicate your want and needs with your partner, as well as how your thoughts are received, is a huge predictor of a strong relationship. Being vulnerable is one of the hardest things to do, but if you are able to be open and share your hopes and fears and dreams, you’re on the right path.

3. Arguing patterns
Are you the type of person who needs to kiss and makeup immediately following a fight? If so, it’s important to find a partner who either deals with arguing the same way, or is able to adapt to your arguing style. If he’s the type who likes to turn off his phone and take a few days to himself to unwind, this will be a major struggle since you don’t see eye to eye in a time when your emotions are heightened. We often don’t give enough attention to arguing styles, but if you both deal with issues in the same way, you’ll be able to power through life much more smoothly and will develop a deeper bond and understanding of each other through just that alone 

4. Similar values
This one is a given. The way we were raised, our values and what’s important to us in life should be similar to that of our partners for the strongest relationship. Though obvious, this ties back to being on the same page as one another, which will ensure there’s a harmony when making decisions – big and small – throughout the relationship. 

5. Sexual attraction
There are often two rules of opposing thought on this subject. Some claim that a relationship is best when you can be best friends, because chemistry fades, others - like Kevin Bacon who has been married to Kyra Sedgwick for the past 25 years – say that a healthy sex life is the key to their marriage. No matter where you stand, having a physical and sexual attraction to your partner as well as being on the same page to how often and how you go about things behind closed doors, is a great indicator of a strong relationship. 

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